Brand Spankin' New Blog Direction

I'm sure when you followed the link to this post there were several things that you noticed may look differently than when you have visited my blog previously. I promise all these will be explained since I know this change has deeply shaken you and you're sitting on the edge of your seat just hanging on my every word =)

Right now I'm in Fort Collins, Colorado at Campus Crusade's National Staff Conference. Since being here, the Lord has basically destructed my heart, showing me sooooo many walls I've built up over the years, lies I believe, areas in which I don't trust Him etc.

One of these areas is this little world of my blog. I absolutely love to write. I could write and tell stories all day long - and actually have been known to spend much of my life practicing these very things (shocking, I know).

However, when it comes time to press the dreaded 'PUBLISH POST' button, I hesitate, start to sweat a little bit. I'll spare you all the gory details =).

Thoughts race through my head, suffocating logic and God's Spirit.

What gives me the right to be heard? Who do I think I am? What could I possibly have to say that people haven't already heard? Why should I have the nerve to think people trust me enough to read my words? 

Several people at this conference have challenged me to allow God to work in my heart in absolutely whatever way He chooses, no restrictions, barriers, or pretenses: no matter my fears or feelings of inadequacy.

So here I am, willing to be vulnerable on more issues than beauty. Willing to open my life in the hopes that the Lord would use this to touch someone's life for the cause of His kingdom.

'My Reply' will allow God to use my story in a broader context than areas of beauty. I'm excited and kind of terrified, but PUMPED that you're here with me in this mess.

Thanks for reading. You're AWESOME.

Be. Jealous.

We get to wake up to sights like these for the next 10 days.

Soaking up the mountain beauties as we enjoy our first of mmmaaannnyyyy Campus Crusade National Staff Conferences.

LOVIN. IT.

God's Providence

Nate and I just had an appointment last week with a very encouraging man from Florida. We were talking about his life which has included overseas missions and now actively being involved in life at his church.

One of the things he said struck me. He said:

"I have lived a life full of God's providence"

Of course, in our current circumstances, my mind went straight to our financial support. 

But then the Lord kept this phrase on my heart and now I see.....what if God's providence not only includes providing for us financially, but not allowing us to earn so much we fall into a life of materialism?

What if God's providence is not only providing us with support, but keeping us in this process long enough to learn tough lessons, grow in our marriage, become more dependent on Him etc.?

What if God's providence not only includes giving me these encouraging and uplifting relationships, but also placing in my life that one person I struggle to love?

Soooo many things in our life we attribute to "God's providence" when He provides stuff we enjoy. Money. Possessions. Awesome People.

But my mind goes to Job, the character who lives rightly in God's sight and is rich, healthy, and happy. When all those things are taken away Job questions God. God's response in my words goes something like this:

Oh that's right Job, 'cause you were there when I drew the boundaries of the earth? You were there when I formed creation, when I placed the stars in the sky and caused morning to be followed by night....you determined all that, right? The animals cry out to you and you control their days? Nope, Job. That's ME. So, now, tell me again, do you still want to correct My plan for your life?

You can read what is written in this whole conversation in the book of Job, here.

Yet another verse, Romans 11:34, says:

 “For who hath known the mind of the Lord? or who hath been his counsellor?”

Broadening my mind to God's providence this week and resting in the fact that He wants my best and IS providing for me even when my 'Job' mind can't understand it.

Guest Post: Casey Anthony's Smile

Today I don't have humor or jokes. I don't even have my own post. I am a regular reader of Naptime Diaries. I for real think you all need to check it out and read regularly. The author, Jessi Connolly, has enriched my life with the wisdom she displays on her blog. It has been a privilege for me to hear how the Lord works in and through her life.

Today is brought to you by her. She posted this and I just had to share. It's so relevant. So beautiful. With all the talk about Casey Anthony; her trial, the verdict etc. I think Jessi offers us a fresh and godly perspective of the situation. 

Be blessed. 

From galatians 1 

O foolish Galatians! Who has bewitched you? It was before your eyes that Jesus Christ was publicly portrayed as crucified. Let me ask you only this: Did you receive the Spirit by works of the law or by hearing with faith? Are you so foolish? Having begun by the Spirit, are you now being perfected by the flesh? Did you suffer so many things in vain—if indeed it was in vain? Does he who supplies the Spirit to you and works miracles among you do so by works of the law, or by hearing with faith—just as Abraham “believed God, and it was counted to him as righteousness”?

All guilt and speculation and frustration aside, I've heard so much said about Casey Anthony's face. People broken over her smiles and easy going nature. 
And yes, it creeps me out too. 


And then I think of myself. How on Sunday mornings, I wake usually with a thought of what I'll wear. And try on three outfits, and I've even shed a tear before if ones doesn't look just right. If I don't have time for my biweekly shower & hair doing, I'm all flustered and indignant. And I want coffee on the way there and I want to get there early to catch up with some girls. I've been known to check my email during the sermon and sip said Starbucks during worship. And when it's all said and done, I'm more worried about my kids running around like wild banshees than I am about what just transpired in my heart, if anything. And that's just Sunday, the day designated to celebrate my pardon with the family, what about everyday? 


Do ya'll know what I've been pardoned from? I've thought things, done things, said things so much worse than you'd ever ascribe to me or imagine me doing. Things that would make you blush or cry and you'd ask me to just keep them to myself if I tried to confess them. And if the book of Matthew is right, I've done as worse as Casey or whoever it was that killed her sweet daughter. I've had murderous thoughts, therefore I've done murderous things. And worse, I wasn't JUST pardoned - I didn't just get off the hook. 
I know who took the blame. 


The gospel says that the bad news is that there is literally no way I can be "not guilty". From birth, I'm sinful. I want what I want, I want to survive, to take care of me, me, me, me. I am selfish, lazy, angry, self entitled, murderous, slanderous, did I mention angry, awful. Every sinfulness I can think of. I'm all those things. But the good news, sometimes ack! it doesn't feel so good. The good news, (swallow hard) is that knowing the fullness (more than I even know) of my sinfulness, Jesus died for me. So that I can have a relationship with the Father. So that there can be justice. 


We cry, cry, cry for justice. But it's hard to look at Him on the cross imparting justice for us, and imputing righteousness to us. The only one in the room not guilty. The only one in the universe not guilty. Taking the guilt. 


So it seems silly to scowl at Casey's smile each time I see it on the news, when I see the goofy, irreverent, lazy, greasy way I respond to the grace of Jesus Christ. 
On Sunday. Today. Always. 


Foolish galatians Jessi! Who did all this? Who built this life? Your works? Your vain attempts at righteousness? No, the faith He gave, imparted, by His own grace. I didn't build any of this, I have no defense. I'm declared guilty before the trial starts and declared free, by substitution of the punishment recipient, before I ever even sin. 


Father, help me to stop crying for justice and start repenting, praising You because You invented justice. Wrote it, lost Your son for it. Are it. 
And if I smile, let it be with reverent, 
sorrowful, honest joy at Your great love. 

With incomplete and intense gratefulness for Your Son.    

If you need a laugh...

You gotta check these out.

A Funny Face Competition - http://thepioneerwoman.com/photography/2011/07/funny-face-the-winner/

Here's a preview...

Source

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Bill Buttlicker makes his debut on The Office =)

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Source: imgfave.com via Megan on pinterest.

I hope those helped to brighten your day =) 

The Summer of Family

We've had a super fun time this past month getting to be with both our families. Here are some shots of our times together =) P.S. Be prepared for LOTS of pictures...

The Self side of the family took a 'daycation' to Roscoe Village...a town on the old Ohio Canal. It was BEA-Utiful.

My husband is classy...what can I say.

Aannndddd my parents are cute.

Since our families live so far apart [mine in Ohio and Nate's in Florida] we have only gotten together twice, with one of them being our wedding. So it was super fun to get everyone together on a Sunday afternoon, grill out and then play some cornhole.

Obviously Josh was into it.

It was all fun and games.....

Until someone started losing =)

Both of our mothers are pretty much masters of distraction

Then, Nate and I took his family to Cleveland, around where we'll be living. We made a trip to the West Side Market which, if you've never been, you HAVE to go. I think this next picture may be what welcomes me into heaven...

Mom and Dad enjoyed some dessert.

The building is an old train station and the architecture is simply beautiful. I really couldn't capture it the way I wanted to...

Then we made our way to Indiana for Nate's cousin Jess's wedding. It's in the middle of Amish Country. Like, literally in the middle. This is Uncle Dennis and Aunt Connie's front yard, and the road outside their house. Amish, buggies, clothes lines and horse poop are all pretty common....and by 'pretty common' I mean everywhere.

The Farmstead Inn, where the wedding took place was beautiful. Here are the father and daughter walking down the 'aisle' at the rehearsal.

The boys had a recessional for Jess and Micah...Vuvuzelas. AWESOME. And deafening...but more awesome.

Then afterwards we played whiffleball. This was actually started at Nate and my rehearsal and we hope the tradition continues on to many more Berkey weddings!!!

P.S. It's on my bucket list to win one of these games. I haven't had much luck so far...sttttiiilllll pretty bitter, not gonna lie.

But we all had a lot of fun. I love the way the sunlight is catching Catherine's hair. I love her joy.

Jess was gorgeous and the ceremony was full of love and promise.

You may now kiss the bride!!!!!

Oh yeah...then we went to the flea market (The largest this side of the Mississippi River). Found some awesome deals and Alli found the perfect mask. BEST. PICTURE. EVER.

THE END. PTL (Praise the Lord).